The Burning

All of my dreams...fading away...the memory of you ever present within me as I give up the ghost.  To forget you is as impossible as forgetting myself.  Is this all part of the Universal plan, or did something go terribly wrong?  I find myself falling into the abyss, praying for release on the other side.  Something has to change...me, perhaps...I don't know anymore.  I have changed so much, yet here I still am, struggling, forcing myself along day in and day out in an effort to become whatever it is that I must be to make the burning cease.  This love, this burning, has been the most profoundly transformative experience of my existence.  A never-ending trial by fire that has driven me to the brink of insanity and back again many times over.  I don't know whether to laugh, or cry...or both.  My head tells me to walk away and never look back, my heart and soul won't let me.  You are me and I am you...how do you walk away from yourself?  The only separation between us is that of our mortal perceptions, but those perceptions become reality as long as we remain imprisoned within our mortal bodies.  In the depths of my sorrow I dream of leaving this fallible shell behind to stand by your side forever.  Instead, a shadow on the wall is what I have become yet again...a silent, broken angel waiting for the day when you look up and see me, REALLY see me, see US, for what we are, and gently fold your wings around me in a protective embrace.  That will be the day when I am truly free.  Lifetimes I have wandered, searching for you.  And it seems I have found you, only to stand by helplessly and watch you drift away from me in a cruel twist of fate.  I am weary of wandering, and of this burning...I don't want to burn anymore.

©  Lady Jennith, 6/28/2012